How Specific Do Your Prayers Need to Be to “Count”?
In a previous post, I mentioned a prayer practice I started about a year ago. I sometimes wake up in the middle of the night and have trouble getting back to sleep. A few years ago, I heard of a woman who, when faced with this situation, prays through her acquaintances “alphabetically.” She starts with someone with either a first or last name beginning with the letter “A,” goes on to a “B” name, and so on.
Rather than toss and turn with all kinds of thoughts, ideas or worries going through my head, I have adopted this practice. I will often make it through “Z” and still be awake, but sometimes I fall asleep “mid-stream.” Turns out that my “early in the alphabet” contacts get more attention than my “X, Y and Z” friend do.
When I first started doing this, I offered somewhat detailed prayers for each person based on my knowledge of their situations. However, the more my brain kicked in, the more awake I became, and I almost never got back to sleep. So now, I typically just mention someone’s name and then move on.
I wanted to get your thoughts on how “effective” this type of prayer is. Of course, it’s great to pray detailed and specific prayers for others. Author Stormie Omartian has written a series of excellent books promoting the power of praying husbands, wives, parents, grandparents, etc. Each book runs about 200 pages and suggests very detailed prayers about every aspect of life: spiritual state, physical health, family relationships, friendship choices, and other areas. These wonderfully specific prayers guide the reader through prayers about details they may not have thought of.
A scene in the 2019 movie A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood – where Tom Hanks portrays Fred Rogers (Mr. Rogers) – represents the other end of the spectrum. It shows Mr. Rogers praying through a lengthy list of people, merely mentioning their names. His prayers cover dozens or even hundreds of people but are paper-thin. So are my middle-of-the-night prayers.
Being a typical American Christian, I wonder about the “value” of various types of prayers. Do my tiny prayers “do any good”? Are detailed prayers more “effective” than simpler ones?
I think we subconsciously adopt a mindset that assumes the more “prayer minutes” you rack up, the more likely the answer. Sometimes we implicitly operate with an unspoken equation based on:
The number of people praying
x
The number of times they pray
x
How long they pray
The higher the total number of minutes prayed, the better. And you get bonus points if the prayers are especially “fervent.”
Of course, I wouldn’t be so crass as to “demand” that God be bound by this formula, but I often unintentionally operate under the above assumption.
However, at its heart, prayer is a reflection of a RELATIONSHIP, not a formula to get a reluctant God to bend to your will. Jesus says it’s unthinkable that a father would give his child a scorpion if they asked for an egg. How much more is your relationship with God defined by his unfathomable love? Rather than being an indifferent being who must be coerced into answering your prayers, he is your loving father who invites you to bring any and every concern to him. There is no such thing as a “useless” prayer, and we should ditch the concept of evaluating which “prayer methods” are most likely to “yield results.” The highest purpose of prayer is NOT to convince God to do what you want. Rather, it’s to strengthen your relationship with God and reinforce your dependence on him for everything. So despite their “effectiveness” or relative lack thereof, I think my middle-of-the-night prayers for my friends please God.
What do you think? I’d love to hear your thoughts.